From Bed to Bed, From Blow to Blow: The Mother Wound That Bleeds in Love
- El Rincón Mágico de Seladriel
- Jul 10
- 7 min read
Updated: Jul 16
THE SONG OF THE FRAGMENTED MASCULINE:
"Cuando Nadie Me Ve" (When No One Sees Me) isn’t just a romantic ballad — it's a psychic confession of a masculine that doesn’t know how to hold love, because he's still wrestling with his roots:
“What wasn’t resolved with the mother, gets projected onto every woman.
What wasn’t expressed with the mother, gets vomited into relationships.”
"I once loved a man who resembled this music video far too much: seductive, elusive, charming… and lost.”
A man who lives halfway between his light and his shadow:
"Sometimes I soar, spinning in circles / Sometimes I hide behind open doors..."
Alejandro Sanz's song reveals the inner struggle of a divided man, constantly swinging between his craving for freedom and his fear of vulnerability.
He’s the kind of man who wants to be everything — yours, the wind’s, time’s — but cannot anchor himself. He won’t choose the commitment that comes with fully surrendering.
This duality reveals a fragmented soul — at times feeling alive and connected, and at others hiding behind silence and invisible walls.
THE LYRICS: A MAP OF CONTRADICTIONS:
“Sometimes I’m yours, and sometimes I belong to the wind”
— shows how he doesn't even belong to himself. He gives himself in moments, but never commits emotionally.
“Don’t turn on the lights, I’ve got my soul and body naked”
— he wants pleasure, but not light; intimacy, but no exposure; to be touched, but not seen.
“I don’t understand my life”
— the most brutal confession. No inner direction, because there was no early emotional guidance.
The Mother Wound:
When a boy doesn’t feel seen, held, or unconditionally loved by his mother, he grows up craving the feminine — but unable to hold it. He seeks it in bodies, but he cannot nest. Sex becomes comfort, not root.
The Weight of Silence and Contradiction:
"Sometimes I tell you why this silence..."
This silence isn’t absence — it’s a wall of fear. A silence full of unresolved questions:
• Why is it so hard to feel what I feel?
• Why can’t I give you my whole life?
This man battles his own inability to live love in fullness — trapped in the belief that loving too much means losing himself, and loving too little means protecting himself. Not knowing that protection is also his prison.
When No One Sees Him: The Mask and the True Self
"When no one sees me, I can be or not be..."
These words show the split between public image and hidden intimacy. When no one sees him, he allows himself to cry, to feel, to be vulnerable. But in the daylight, he hides again — puts on the tough skin the world expects.
This is the great spiritual challenge: how to reconcile what we are in private with what we show? How to make the love we feel in solitude turn into real and consistent actions?
The Deep Wound: Offering Only Moments
"Not giving you my whole life, just those moments…"
This is the heart of the void the song exposes. The pain of someone who can only offer crumbs of himself — fleeting fragments that never become a whole.
And in those fragments, both the giver and the receiver are left hurt and empty.
Reflection for the Feminine Soul
As a woman who has seen these patterns, I know we cannot be the temporary refuge of a soul that doesn’t know how to hold itself.
We’re not here to share crumbs, but to walk in fullness and reciprocity.
This song is a wake-up call for the sleeping masculine — to face his fear and dare to BE, even when someone else is watching.
THE VIDEOCLIP: A BATTLE WITH THE FEMININE
The Alley: The Emotional Evasion of the Inner Child
Alejandro walks with his head down, lost, as if fleeing from himself.He represents the man who hasn’t taken emotional responsibility.Each time he appears there, he’s in evasion mode.
The alley also symbolizes his inner world: isolated, directionless, dark. He’s lost and locked within himself — the inner child walking without a mother, without emotional shelter. There’s no loving feminine figure to receive him.
The Room: Bodies as Anesthesia, Not Home
It’s not a romantic room, but a surreal, dreamlike one — with plastic drapes, artificial colors, and different women who are always the same in essence: there’s no real connection.
They’re just bodies. Moments. Excuses not to feel.
The pattern repeats with different women — symbols of the failed attempt to fill the soul with bodies.
Each woman represents an illusion of intimacy that keeps repeating and wearing out.
The female body used as anesthesia for the soul.
And though his body is there, his soul is not.
He doesn’t make love — he avoids it through pleasure.
“When love with the mother was experienced as lack or demand, pleasure becomes addiction disguised as conquest..."
The Ring: The Unconscious War Against the Feminine
The man fights women, or rather, faces the archetype of the woman who confronts him — who no longer surrenders so easily.
He doesn’t fight women, but specters: his guilt, abandonment, fear of rejection. Each punch he receives is a cry for what’s unhealed.
Each woman embodies an aspect of the feminine: anger, sensuality, betrayal, tenderness, abandonment, and rejected love. In all the scenes, he fights with bare fists — and that’s key.
He doesn’t protect himself. He doesn’t arm himself. He meets pain with the arrogance of one who thinks he can control the uncontrollable… and ends up wounded.
He loses every fight. Because the masculine that doesn’t honor its wound, repeats the war.
A man fighting with bare hands shows: he doesn’t know how to defend himself, nor how to surrender — he only resists.
And each woman hits him like one who cries out:
"I’m not your mother — but you carry me like your childhood war."
The Outer Landscape: The False Freedom and the Mirage of Escape
Each time he walks outside, he’s moving away from the walls — his inner prison.
But the sky only clears once he’s emotionally defeated.
When he’s on the ground. When he can no longer resist. When the mask falls.
✦ THE MOTHER WOUND: THE ROOT OF IT ALL
“Dear man, if you haven’t healed the relationship with your mother, no woman will ever give you what you’re still hoping to receive: recognition, tenderness, validation. The women you love are not your mother..”
They are not here to heal you, applaud you, or endure your emotional silence or passive mistreatment.
The controlling, absent, narcissistic, or immature mother can leave a boy emotionally disoriented — and he may grow into a man who is:
• Addicted to sex or conquest
• Unable to receive deep love
• Emotionally distant
• And often cruel, without even realizing it
✦ CLOSING: I TOO SAW THAT ALLEY
“I loved a man who lived in that alley. Who walked without seeing. Who got lost in sheets and never found himself.
I was one of those women in his ring.
I offered him wings, but he only knew the language of emotional fists..”
Today, I no longer wait to be seen when no one’s watching.
Today, I love myself in broad daylight.
Today, I am not the emotional corner of any lost man.
When a man doesn’t heal his wound with his mother, he ends up wounded by every woman who tried to love him whole.
This is not an attack or a revenge.It is my way of giving meaning to what I lived — and sharing what many can’t yet name.
If this reaches you, may it accompany you with honesty.
✦ FINAL MESSAGE TO THE MAN WITH A MOTHER WOUND:
This final message is for you —the man who, through my words, has recognized the pattern of trying to fill emotional voids with casual sex or fleeting relationships.
I want you to know: you are not alone.
Having emptiness inside does not make you any less worthy of love.
On the contrary, you deserve to be held —with tenderness, with compassion, with truth.
The first step toward healing is this: to acknowledge that something hurts.
That something is missing.
Asking for help does not make you broken.
In fact, it elevates you. It makes you human. It makes you shine in the eyes of those of us who have learned to see wounds not through judgment, but through unconditional love.
I invite you to seek a wise guide—a therapist, a spiritual teacher, or simply a return to your own true self.
Being vulnerable is your greatest strength—not a weakness.
And if my words have reached you, know that I embrace you from here—with a clean soul,and an open heart.
Now the question is for you, reader:
How many times have you been the battlefield of a man or woman who wasn’t capable of loving — only of repeating their story?
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🌹 Thank you for reading me, for feeling with me, and for honoring your own light and shadow.
Love
Melissa – Seladriel
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